Wednesday, February 27, 2008

My night with Bloody Birthday's Julie Brown

No, not "Downtown Julie Brown", which everyone seems to get a kick out of asking. The OTHER MTV Julie Brown, the one with actual talent. Yes, the star of such classics as Bloody Birthday, Earth Girls are Easy and Medusa: Dare to Be Truthful performed a few live shows in NYC last weekend and I was there, poster and VHS tape in hand, to see the show and ambush her afterward.

Julie looks like she hasn't aged a day in a decade and she pulled out all her gayest hits, kicking off with "Hey Hey Hey I Wanna Be Gay" and pulling guys up onstage to perform "Girl Fight Tonight" and making male audience members sing the chorus to "I Like 'Em Big and Stupid" and "Shut Up and Fuck Me". Yes, it was a family show.

Afterward CampBlood "Special" Correspondent Chuckie and I ambushed Julie with a horde of other queens. The guys who got to her first had a bunch of her albums and Medusa DVDs (yawn!) but as she was signing them she spotted what I was holding and yelped, "IS THAT BLOODY BIRTHDAY!?" Everyone wanted to touch me. It was awesome.

Anyway, she was a doll and laughed about the movie and signed my video box and a hilarious Italian poster for my dear friend Tintorera Joe. And Chuckie even snapped a picture of me with her, but as Joe's Pub has a drink minimum and huge martinis, we were sloshed and the pic is fuzzy.

And yes, I am wearing the same t-shirt that I have worn in every pic of me on this site. It's my celebustalk good luck shirt, and it's never let me down, so you all can suck it.

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Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Dead: "Original Gill Man", Ben Chapman

I know I don't write much about old-timey horror movies here because ... well, because I don't really like them. But I'm saddened by the death of Ben Chapman, the man who played the Gill Man in the 1954 3-D classic, The Creature From the Black Lagoon. It's not because he turned in a stellar performance (he wasn't even credited and didn't do any of the underwater shots, which were performed by a stuntman), but because I met Ben at a horror convention 6 years ago and he couldn't have been sweeter. (My Buffy-nut friend Amanda actually knew him from growing up in Hawaii, where Ben lived. Her mom taught him how to use a computer or something.)

The actor was six-foot-five and a former Marine, and was a staple of the convention circuit. He will be missed. Here's an interview with the actor with some great clips...

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Monday, February 25, 2008

We Are the (Blackface) World, We Are the (Blackface) Children

This isn't gay, and it isn't horror, but that doesn't mean that it is any less likely to make your brains run out of your ears in bloody rivers. Big ups to snicks for finding this shit.

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Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Put down the gun and tiara and come out of the float

I'll freely admit, I'm waaaaay more excited about this than I should be.

This coming weekend CampBlood "Special" Correspondent Chuckie and I are going to see one of my all-time favorite actresses/personalities/songwriters, Julie Brown.

No, not THAT Julie Brown, the other one. The redhead? From Just Say Julie, back when MTV was actually fun? Earth Girls Are Easy? "The Homecoming Queen's Got a Gun"?

Nothing? Um... the chick who takes her top off and gets an arrow in her eye from her evil little sister in Bloody Birthday? Aaaaaahhhhh, that's it. Yes, her. LOVE. HER. Aside from writing and starring in the best furry alien sex comedy musical that Damon Wayans ever appeared in, she introduced the phrase "harder and more often" (via Medusa: Dare to Be Truthful) into my life. And for that I owe her everything.

I'm going to try to ambush her and get her to sign my old VHS box and a hilarious overseas Bloody Birthday poster for my pal Tintorera Joe. And who knows, maybe I'll get my pic taken with her in the same fucking t-shirt I seem to be wearing every time I have my photo taken with a celebitty.

In the meantime, enjoy this rather hilarious fanvid of Bloody Birthday (set to Smashing Pumpkins' "1979", of all things!), which starts out with the scene in question.

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Friday, February 15, 2008

Friday Afternoon Videos: My Banana Hands, Sweding Elm Street, and more

Here's some crap to brighten your day...

A Nightmare on Elm Street ... "sweded"
What used to be "affectionate recreation" has been dubbed "sweding", a term that will get a lot of play once Michel Gondry's Be Kind Rewind comes out in a few weeks. I think Gus van Sant technically brought the questionable art form in to the mainstream with his shot-by-shot Psycho remake, but the low-fi fan-created recreations are generally much more fun.

Check out A Nightmare on Elm Street in just five minutes, with all the major setpieces intact. Seriously, the woman who plays Ronnee Blakley is just about the best thing EVER.

Jane Fonda says "Cunt" on The Today Show
I really thought I couldn't love this woman any more, especially since her brilliant "Cooking with Feminists" segment on The Colbert Report. But the bitch went and upped her game.

My Hands Are Bananas
Why, you're right! They are!

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Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Humbert wants you to have a happy fucking Valentine's Day

Didn't have the chance to draw up any new gay horror valentines this year (from the wonderfully talented Andy Swist, of course!), but be sure to check out these various and wonderful past years' collections for print-and-cut homo horror romantic madness.

Keep your hearts close, kids. With Humbert out there, no one is safe!

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Monday, February 11, 2008

Ellen Page can go to "Hell"

Okay, this is as excited as I've gotten about horror movie news in a long time: Ellen Page has been booked to star in Sam Raimi's next project, a horror film called Drag Me to Hell. The best part is that, unlike many projects that people get "attached" to and then forget about, this one actually starts filming next month.

The other good parts are that Ellen Page is ... well, awesome (check out Hard Candy, Juno, and even X3: X-Men Retarded for proof). And let's just pretend not to get excited that Raimi is coming back to horror after hitting the point of diminishing returns on Spiderman (let's be honest, that third one sucked harder than a Lincoln Tunnel ride-along) and delivering some legitimately scary moments with Doc Oc in the franchise's second film (that hospital scene was really effed up, remember?).

His next film, The Lovely Bones, is all weepy and Oscar-baity, so it'll be nice to see him get all supernatural horror again. Drag Me to Hell is about an unsuspecting person who falls prey to a supernatural curse. And it's got "Drag" in the title! Totes gay.

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Insert "Bigger Boat" Joke HERE

Actor Roy Scheider, best known for playing Chief Martin Brody in the 1975 film Jaws, died over the weekend. There was no cause of death released, but he was apparently receiving treatment for cancer of the blood. He was 75.

Scheider was nominated for two Oscars (for The French Connection and All That Jazz) and appeared in like 2000 films. He will be missed.

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Monday, February 4, 2008

Dead: "Savage Weekend" actor Christopher Allport

In a bit of sad news, Fangoria reported on Friday that Christopher Allport, an actor who appeared in numerous genre projects including personal fave Dead & Buried (he gets whacked right at the beginning), Tobe Hooper's Invaders from Mars remake, and the better-than-it-has-any-effing-right-to-be killer snowman movie Jack Frost.

But queer horrorhounds may know Allport best for his role as Nicky, the bar-brawling sissy, in the pervy 1979 slasher Savage Weekend. In a day and age when the few gay characters who made it onto screens were mincing, weak, and made vulnerable by their sexuality (see: Cruising, Cruising, Cruising), Nicky was a standout in that he was mincing, aggressive, and batshit crazy.

In an early scene, Nicky - after being taunted at a roadhouse by some upstate yokels for ordering a martini, wearing short-shorts and basically making Richard Simmons look like Steve Altas - accuses one of his tormentors of sleeping with his mother and unexpectedly flies into a furious rage, breaking beer bottles and pool cues over the heads and backs of the unsuspecting hicks and hissing, "I wasn't raised in the South Bronx for nothin!" before strutting safely out of the bar.

Of course, being a slasher movie, things don't go that well for Nicky for too long, and he meets his death while bedecked in pantyhouse and full makeup. Atta girl!

Anyway, back to Allport: the poor guy died when he was caught in an avalanche while skiing in San Bernadino (Allport wrote a story for the LA Times in 2004 about the pleasures of back-country skiing). He was 61 when he died and had been married to his wife, Carolyn Bohannan, for nearly 30 years.

And no, the irony of the fact that the guy starred in a movie about a killer snowman and died in an avalanche has not been lost on me, nor should it be ignored. Don't blame me, blame the universe.

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Friday, February 1, 2008

Trailer (Not-So) Fabulous: April Fool's Day 2008

AKA: I Know What the Terror Train Did Last Prom Night in Laguna Beach.

Or: The Rage: My Super Fucking Atrocity Direct-to-Video Shitbag 16

I hope Clayton Rohner hunts down these assholes and kills them in even less imaginative ways than this movie has come up with, all the while screaming "Yeah, and I'm Cindy Lauper!"

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