| Helloween
5: Hell is Full and the Dead are Dressed to Impress |
| Prepare
Yourself for the Parade of Larry Craig Costumes
Nope, no toe-tappers or Superbugs to be had in this
batch, folks -- just another installment in our annual celebration of
some of the worst Halloween costumes imaginable. Some of these are actually
available for purchase on the Internets -- though I'll be damned if I'm
going to tell you where. For winners (losers?) from past years, check
out 2006, 2005,
2004
and 2003.
(Have I really been doing this that long? Bugger me!)
Enjoy! |
| 
Menses Lee
"Get it? 'Cause I'm a maxi pad ... AND two tampons ... AND menstrual
blood ... AND a NINJA!
BOO-YA!"
|
Polar Fleece Suicide Bomber
Kid, my advice is to push the button before it's too late.
|
Super Handjob Brothers
I don't know what's more disturbing about this costume: the placement
of the joystick or the fact that it looks like a priest is wearing it.
|
| 
The Ambiguously Gay Duo
And by "Ambiguously", I mean "Unambiguously".
|
Asteroids
"Mommy, I want my head to look like Lord Byron's junk in his final
moments!"
|
Hulk
Hogan
Play to your strengths, I always say. |
| 
Mustard
... hold the "Mus".
|
Turnip
Unless you're selling your kid as bait to To Catch a Cannibal,
I just don't get it.
|
Dead Celebrity
Okay, I'm all for tasteless jokes, but there are limits. What kind of
monster would dig up the corpse of Steve Irwin and dress
it up like Bill Maher?!?!?
|
Smurfs
Because they weren't gay enough to begin with... |
Hitler's
Gunt
Now we know why he was so testy: Maria dressed him in Mom khakis! |
Internet
Porn
Never miss an opportunity to emblazon your young daughter with the word
"BUSH". |
Snakes on a Gay
|
Ti-Fighter
Wear
it belted! This costume sucks most because it's impossible to get drunk
while wearing it. I'd sooner go as his friend, "Guy hiding behind
wall behind Ti-Fighter with handfull of marbles and taser."
|
RON, TRON's Middle-Aged Cousin
Even
the Motherboard needs a substitute music teacher.
|
