Let’s Work Together to Figure Out What in the Name of All That is Holy Happened to This Bird, Shall We?

All apologies to my vegetarian readers, but I simply could not bear singular witness to this horrific image. (And, for the record, I did not eat this guy.)

Just now I was walking back from the barber on 121st Street and Broadway when I happened to notice the above monstrosity lying on the sidewalk. Note the carefully curated arrangement of the remains. Note the clean concrete – no bloodstains or stray feathers to be had. And note that, while this horrific objet d’art was technically adjacent to Columbia University’s campus, it was nowhere near the Jeffrey L. Dahmer School for Ritual Sacrifice and Corpse Display Design.

A few of my guesses as to what unholy events may have led to this WTF moment – I welcome you to add your own.

  1. Bert from Sesame Street‘s charming obsession with pigeons has slid into something altogether more sinister
  2. The Blair Witch finally decided to get off her ass and go for that Masters in Public Administration
  3. Some sicko is kidnapping tiny Victoria’s Secret models
  4. Tippi Hedren is finally getting her revenge, one filthy fowl at a time

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About Buzz

Buzz created CampBlood.org in 2003 to meet a need for a safe place for weirdos of all stripes to discuss horror movies from a queer perspective. Now that the campers have overtaken the Camp staff and locked them in the Arts & Crafts cabin he is questioning that decision.